Nov 22 2008
Valentine Nebraska’s “Butt Bandit” Caught With His Pants Down
This story cracks me up:
Police have arrested a man suspected of leaving greasy, graphic imprints on the windows of stores, churches and schools in a small Nebraska town. A 35-year-old man was caught in the act by police early Wednesday morning, Cherry County Attorney Eric Scott said Friday. The man hasn’t been charged yet, but authorities believe he is the vandal some townsfolk have dubbed the “Butt Bandit.”
Beginning in spring of 2007, a mystery vandal visited businesses at night, pressing his naked behind - sometimes his groin, sometimes both - on windows. The marks were made with lotion or petroleum jelly, and while police had earlier worried copycat criminals were getting involved, Scott said they now believe it’s “the act of a lone deviant.”
“This isn’t normal behavior for Valentine, Neb.,” Scott said. “It’s an embarrassment for the hardworking people who live here.”
Wait, a guy from Valentine goes around making “impressions” on local shop windows. Oh the humanity! This adds an entirely new meaning to “stained” glass windows at the local churches. Maybe he was just providing creative bun advertising for the local bakery. Could Valentine be the secret hangout of Joe the Plumber?
The best part of the story was the concern by police over copycat criminals or was it copycrack criminals?
This has been a big news year for Nebraska. First, we had the Safe Haven Law/teenager dumping ground and now we have the vertical smilings of the Butt Bandit. Nebraska rocks!
